What Should Have Been
by Twillight Bunny
Summary: A dumb parody of the first movie, courtesy of yours truly. Meant to be funny. Rated T for for swearing.
1. Karaoke at the Lodge

Disclaimer: I don't own High School Musical.

A/N: God, I can't believe I actually did a HSM fic! I feel so dirty...eeuurgghh... (runs off to shower)

_some time later..._

Okay, I'm back.

Basically, this fic is going to be my take on different moments that happened in the movie, and please excuse any gaps in the storyline since I've never actually seen any of the movies fully. All I can take are short, seven minute stretches before the corniness makes my eyes bleed...

This is meant to be funny, but since I'm bored out of my skull at the moment I hope you guys get my humour. Anywho, on with the fic!

* * *

They were standing opposite each other on the stage, eyes wide with embarrassment as they clutched their respective microphones in their rapidly sweating hands.

Above them, the spotlight blazed down, the harsh white light hurting their eyes, making them squint a little as they adjusted to it. The New Years Eve party was full of teenagers, laughing and talking and dancing and doing whatever else one does at parties, loud music blaring from speakers placed strategically around the room.

Then, it had quietened down, the deejay cheerily announcing that a karaoke contest had been set up, and that the stage was now open to anyone who wanted it.

The crowd had erupted into cheers at this, and soon the two of them had wound up being jostled and pushed and all but man-handled towards the stage. They tried to fight it, but the mass of shoving hands was too simply too much. Some kid in a large Viking hat elbowed her in the ribs, making her grunt as the small flash of pain ran through her body and soon disappeared.

Gabriella Montez hated people. Now, she got along with most of them, but that was only because she tended to ignore their existance, and vice versa. She supposed that it led to many lonely days at school, but to be honest she didn't really care, what with all the moving her family did.

In any case, it allowed her to focus on her studies, and she was glad for that. Besides, it was hard for her to find anything to talk about with other girls, the simpering morons always fawning over some boy or another.

Speaking of which, the boys in her previous schools hadn't been any better either. Just because she had...er..._developed_ a little earlier than most of the girls her age, they wound up talking to her chest about seventy percent of the time. It was annoying, to say the least. And the boy before her right now was obviously ogling her, making her sub-consciously tug at the neckline of her dress.

_Idiot_.

Troy Bolton stared at his impromptu singing partner, and he had to admit, he certainly liked what he saw.

Her shapely figure was clad in a gauzy white long-sleeved dress, the hem reaching a little bit above her knees. She had long, shiny dark brown hair that cascaded over her shoulders to the middle of her back, with brown eyes that were currently narrowed at the object in her hands. High cheekbones, and skin the colour of really milky coffee that was all but flawless accentuated her sweet, heart-shaped face.

Her full lips formed a small pout, the pink flesh drawing together distastefully as she surveyed the cheering crowd around them.

Then, her eyes locked on his own, and Troy immediately decided that he was smitten by this stranger. Turning on the old Bolton charm, he smiled in that way that made most of the girls at East Side High start giggling and swooning, even scratching the back of his head nervously for good measure, a move which he knew reduced entire roomfuls of girls to simpering puddles of goo.

Surprisingly, she seemed to hold her ground, tilting her head to one side a little as she studied him with an unreadable expression on her face. Parting his lips, he spoke in his patented dream-boy voice:

"I'll sing if you will..."

Her reply?

"Fuck off."


	2. Detention

Disclaimer: Not mine.

* * *

Gabriella sighed as her mom dropped her off at her new school. East Side High. For the strangest reason, saying those three words made thunder crackle ominously, even though it was sunny out.

"Oh well, whatever." thought Gabriella as she made her way towards the cheerily painted front doors of said educational institution.

All around her, people milled around in slightly too-bright clothes, chatting with one another, smiles more plastic than picnic cutlery plastered all over their faces.

As she walked, Gabriella noticed that this particular school seemed to actually embrace stereotypes, small clusters of goths and skaters warily circling each other like lions on the National Geographic channel here, nerds grouped together over there.

On the far end of the school grounds, a commotion broke out as a whole team of jocks suddenly exited a bus, whooping and hollering like lunatics. She ignored them, of course, striding purposefully into the building instead.

After getting her affairs in order at the school office, she was shown to her homeroom. Taking a deep breath, she squared her shoulders and entered.

Once Gabriella stepped into the room, she noticed a few things.

One, everyone seemed to be ignoring her, which was fine.

Two, everyone seemed to be seated according to stereotype, the front of the class filled by obvious nerds, then jocks, followed by drama geeks, skaters and finally goths in the back row.

Seriously, what was up with these people?

The third thing she noticed was that a girl in an obscenely sparkly outfit was fluffing her shiny blonde hair, an aura that screamed 'BITCH!' emanating from her every pore. The amount of glittering pink-ness on her person was enough to make Gabriella try to shield her eyes with her hand, which she did. Beside this strange creature of pink glitter and hairspray, a boy wearing a black fedora smiled shyly at her, before turning back to the blonde.

Mercifully, the homeroom teacher, an enormous creature swaddled in a hideous shawl-thing, beads criss-crossing her neck and huge glasses that magnified the fine veins in her dull, yellow eyes assigned her a seat after an uninterested introduction , which she all but dove towards.

Ah, yes. She could feel the familiar hostility of her peers, the collective hatred from the roomfull of people boring into the back of her skull.

Suddenly, her cellphone vibrated, indicating that she had just received a text message. Pulling it out from her pocket, she opened it, and stared curiously at the screen. It was an unidentified number, and all it said was 'Hi. Remember me?'

As she sat there, trying to figure out who the hell had sent her that message, a shadow loomed over her desk. Ms. Darbus, in all her weird old-lady glory stared at her maliciously, a bucket in her hand. "No cellphones in my class, miss Montez. See me after class for your detention." she hissed, sending small drops of spittle shooting towards Gabriella. Dropping her phone into the bucket, the brown-haired girl watched as the shawled cow that was her teacher walked around the class, collecting cellphones and handing out detentions left and right.

"Bitch." Gabriella thought bitterly.

Time flew by quickly after that, and soon the period was over.

"Okay maggots, here's your detention. You hooligans are going to work as stagehands on the set of the school's next musical. I need someone who can do the painting, and I'm going to need some people to help stuff the camel..."

Gabriella was only half listening. The group of people around her all had expressions of varying boredom on their faces as Ms. Darbus went on. One boy, however, seemed vaguely familiar...

Shit. It's that what's-his-face from the lodge, and he was _still_ staring at her boobs. Ignoring the old cow droning on in front of her, Gabriella stormed up to the boy, where she stared jabbing him in the chest as she began screaming.

"GET YOUR FUCKING EYES OFF MY FUCKING BOOBS YOU FUCKING PIECE OF VOMIT!"

Finally, he tore his eyes from her chest, the shocked silence of everyone present making the furious pounding in her temples all the more pronounced. Then, grabbing her backpack, she turned towards Ms. Darbus, casually nodded once and left the room.

* * *

A/N: Okay guys, here's where I'm going to need your help. See, I've never actually seen any of the movies fully, so if it's not too much trouble, could someone tell me what happens next? Hehehe I know, I'm not a real fan of this fandom...


	3. Say Hello to Rory!

Disclaimer: Still not mine. All I own is Rory and random student #117.

A/N: Okay, I thought about it, and I finally decided on a direction for this fic. From this chapter onwards, it's going to be a let's-corrupt-the-original-storyline-with-a-shameless-insertion-of-an-all-powerful-OC fic. Expect Chad-bashing in later chapters. Yay, this is the first OC I've ever created, whee!

Rory: You know you love me.

Me: Yeah, yeah, just remember who's the boss here.

Rory: (sticks tongue out) Whatever.

Me: That's it, it's rape time!!

Rory: Acck noooooooooooooooooooooooooooOkay.

On with the story!

* * *

_Detention..._

Everyone was grudgingly doing their meaningless tasks on the set, some painting backdrops, some doing random lifting of heavy objects, and a few stuffing the camel Ms. Darbus mentioned before. It was a horrible sequinned thing, meant to be used at some point in the school's production of 'Twinkle Town' later on, though nobody really cared at the moment.

Troy Bolton was busy fixing crepe leaves to a large, twisted tree when he noticed a certain brunette practically flinging paint at an enormous , papier-mache fire hydrant. Streaks of bright red dripped to the floor, though she didn't seem to care at all. She was weird, he certainly had to admit. Gabriella Montez was the weirdest person he had ever met, and he liked it for some reason.

By the piano, Ms. Darbus was barking something at Kelsi, the poor girl hurriedly re-writing something on the sheet of paper in front of her with a squeak. She was working on the score for the musical, though it was apparent that Ms. Darbus had other opinions on the matter. Over on the other side of the stage, Sharpay and her twin were huffily stuffing the camel, bits of straw sticking in their hair.

Suddenly, time froze.

Random student # 117, who had been nailing boards together to form a spaceship, abruptly exploded, leaving small sooty stains on the floor. A shimmering column of air twisted into existance, and a figure began to form in the heart of it. Soon, the mysterious figure stepped forward.

His cherubic good looks were contrasted with longish indigo hair with streaks of black, and he surveyed his surroundings curiously with large, sea-green eyes.

This strange boy was dressed in a black, long-sleeved t-shirt, baggy cargoes a faded olive green in colour and nondescript black army boots. A nametag that said 'Rory' was pinned to his chest, though it glittered and vanished after a few seconds. Looking upwards at nothing in particular, he began to speak.

Rory: Okay, I'm here. Man, you should have called me in during the second chapter, this fic stinks!

Author-who-shall-henceforth-be-referred-to-as-Twillight-Bunny-or-TB-for-short: Shut the fuck up!

Rory: ...

TB: What?

Rory: You're mean.

TB: I know. Meh, fine. I'll make it up to you. If you're a good boy and stick to the plan, I'll let you keep Ryan as your own personal sex-bunny. That okay?

Rory: Squee! (runs over and pets the still frozen Ryan) Can I use the blueberry yogurt and cattle prod?

TB: (eye twitch) Uhh...whatever. Just remember, you're supposed to screw up the storyline as much as you can, okay? Oh, and pick on Chad. A lot.

Rory: Yessuh boss, you betcha by golly gee whiz uh huh. (continues playing with Ryan's hair.)

TB: (grumbles) Just get to it, and don't mess it up, you hear?

Rory skipped back to his spot by the half-nailed spaceship, where he snapped his fingers, making time un-freeze. Nobody seemed to notice the untimely demise of random student #117, instead carrying on with their tasks as if nothing had happened. Walking over to Gabriella, who was still painting the fire hydrant, he cleared his throat, before speaking.

"Hi, I'm Rory. You're Gabriella Montez, right?"

"Fuck off."

"Screw you, whore."

Surprised, she studied him, before smiling.

"I think we're going to be best friends."

* * *

God this was short...Like I said before, I'm not sure what happens next, so unless someone tells me I can't continue...Oh well, review and let me know what you think, okay?

On a random note, I do believe that I'm slowly becoming obsessed with the phrase ' Stuff the camel.'


	4. Sign Up

Disclaimer: Not mine and so on.

Rory: Seriously, that last chapter was awful. You know you really suck, right?

Me: Shut it indigo boy, or else I'll…uhm…turn this fic into a TayRyellaPay. Yeah, you heard me, biotch.

Rory: Indigo boy? (raises eyebrow.) YOU WOULDN'T DARE!

Me: on with the story!

* * *

The next day, Troy found himself staring jealously, grinding his teeth and stomping his feet like a spoilt child as Gabriella and some kid with purple hair chatted away, laughing occasionally. Various random students milled about, creating an illusion of a busy hallway even though they didn't actually _go _anywhere.

The two were walking towards the science labs together, a class that Troy conveniently shared as well. Out of nowhere, Chad snuck up behind him, before abruptly glomping Troy as he uttered a spine-chilling cry that for some reason was only heard by the mop-haired basketball captain.

"What the fuck dude!" screamed Troy as he spun around, knocking Chad into a few lockers.

The boy's hideous afro acted as an airbag, harmlessly absorbing most of the impact from the otherwise bone-crushing blows. The two of them continued spinning for a while, slamming into various objects in the process, including but not limited to: a vending machine, a cotton candy stand, a man in a penguin suit and the stuffed camel that for some reason was propped up against a cow dressed in a tartan dress.

On closer inspection, said cow turned out to be Ms. Darbus, who glared at them before waddling away with her precious fake desert animal.

"That's weird."

"Yeah. Why is there a vending machine in this hallway?"

"I dunno. Maybe it's-Hey, seriously dude, get the fuck off me already."

"But I'm a ninja. Didn't you hear my awesome cry of ninji-tude?"

"Get. Off. Me."

"You suck."

Troy knew he would have to resort to the ultimate move to get his ridiculously-haired friend to let him go. Taking a deep breath, he then said:

"Chad, you're _touching_ me."

With that, Chad screamed, flinging himself off his team-mate as though he had been burned.

"Omigawd, like, you're right! We were like, totally touching for, like, minutes! God, now everyone's gonna think I'm like, totally like, gay and stuff! I gotta go like, man up now!"

The pearls of pure wisdom having left his mouth thusly, Chad then ran off, leaving a confused Troy to wonder at his friend's sudden acquisition of a valley girl accent. Shaking his head, he then realized that his little escapade with his cotton-candy haired friend had made him late for class, and it was his turn to zoom off.

For added fun, Troy made little racecar noises as he ran, thinking that it magically made him move faster.

An hour later, science was over, and students filed out of the class.

Rory and Gabriella were laughing at how Troy had burst into the class fifteen minutes late, babbling something about ninjas and the stuffed camel.

Luckily for him, their science teacher was completely stoned again that day, and he had ignored the fact that he was so late. As the two of them rounded a corner, Troy suddenly joined them, smiling sweetly at Gabriella who simply gave him the finger while glaring at Rory, who was currently ignoring the both of them as he eye-raped Ryan from across the hallway. The yummy blonde boy was with his sister, who suddenly walked over towards them.

Time froze again.

Rory: What is it now?

TB: Aren't you paying attention? Troy and Gabriella are practically at the sign-up sheet for the musical already. Here comes Sharpay to do that retarded giant signature thing.

Rory: Yeah, so?

TB: So, stop her already! Remember the- STOP EYE-RAPING RYAN YOU BASTARD!

Rory: Ugh, you're so whiny, you know? Maybe that's why you don't have any friends…

TB: TAYRYELLAPAY! (complete with ominous bursts of thunder.)

Rory: Eep! Alright fine, you sicko. (He snaps his fingers, and Sharpay explodes.) Happy now?

TB: No, you deliciously adorable moron you! I need her for plot development later!

Rory: Oh puh-lease. You're totally making this up as you go along, aren't you? I mean c'mon, a fic _this_ bad couldn't possibly have any planning to it whatsoever anyways...

TB: Fuck you. (grumbles.)

Rory: Ah, I'll take your eloquent answer as a yes then…

TB: Fine, you jerk, I'll just resurrect her later if I need her, so there. (sticks tongue out and walks away.)

Time unfreezes, and Ryan walked up, looking oddly at the smoldering pile of hair and glitter that was now his sister. Rory began to twitch, giggling uncontrollably as a grin split his features. The blonde then smiled at him, causing the indigo-haired boy to erupt into a series of happy, quiet squees. Gabriella and Troy joined them, and the four of them stood awkwardly around the sign up sheet for the school musical.

"Guess I'm going to sign up now." Ryan said, eyeing Rory a little warily. "Uhh, is he going to be okay?"

Gabriella spoke first.

"Beats me, I just met the guy yesterday. Oh, I'm sure he's fine, so whatever. I gotta go…somewhere. Bye."

At this, Rory suddenly piped up:

"Omigawd Gabby we should totally sign up for the musical too!"

Gabriella paused, a look that could have curdled milk fixed on the boy who had suggested the idea. He ignored the death-glare and grinned at her, before grabbing a pen from his backpack and writing both their names on the lined piece of paper.

Her brown eyes flicked from the sign-up sheet, to Rory, and back to the piece of paper on the wall. Slowly, her expression began to change, and she turned around and walked away, muttering something exasperatedly under her breath.

Seeing this, Troy immediately grabbed a pen from random student #32, who happened to be walking by, before writing his own name in a pathetic scrawl on the bottom of the page. Ryan, who was still a little creeped out by the way Rory kept staring at him, added his name to the list as well, before leaving.

A few minutes later, Ms. Darbus emerged from a conveniently placed broom closet nearby, dragging the stuffed camel behind her. Grinning at the sign-up sheet, she then wrapped another hideously tacky shawl around her shoulders, before cackling evilly.

Everything was going according to plan…

* * *

A/N: Dun dun dunnn! Bet you guys didn't see that coming…What could Ms. Darbus possibly have planned? Stay tuned to find out! Oh yeah, review and stuff while you're at it, kay? I have cookies!!


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